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(I wrote this much earlier in the morning, then got distracted by a… - Nite Mirror — LiveJournal [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Nite Mirror

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[Mar. 9th, 2006|10:53 am]
Nite Mirror
(I wrote this much earlier in the morning, then got distracted by a shiny, sparkly thing and forgot to post it until now.)

Today is Mom's birthday. She woke me up with a phone call discussing ... well, a bunch of stuff; some related to Dad's care, some about picking up her birthday cake, some about a friend of hers who is getting a pacemaker today, and ... as I said a bunch of stuff.

Well, I'm sitting here, still have some cobwebs in my head, sipping my morning coffee, and (of course) playing some poker (best hand of the day so far quad Tens, although the 3's full of 2's that I played far too passively was an amusing little hand as well -- partly because I did play it too passively--another metaphor hidden in an inconsequential incident?).

I don't know why but a quote from Richard Bach's Illusions is going through my head. I think I mentioned that book about the reluctant Messiah maybe once or twice here (um, if Mr. Bach is reading this, I'll take the money for promoting your book in small non-sequentially numbered bills -- ah, who am I kidding, I'll take a handful of coins).

"There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts."

When I read that last week, my first thought was "boy, am I gifted!"

Well, this confused teacher will blunder on in his day.

[User Picture]From: saintgeorge
2006-03-09 05:04 pm (UTC)
Hi there! Nice to see you posting again. I was going to send you a nudge, but I thought you might be taking a break. If a friend goes silent for an extended time then I send out messages but two weeks seemed too short. Anyway, you are back and that is good.

You must know that loneliness is a very common problem. Even married people can feel lonely, so being in a relationship is not the solution.
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[User Picture]From: saintgeorge
2006-03-09 09:58 pm (UTC)
"There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts."

Okay, so what is this statement saying to you? My problems of cancer, my overbearing mother, and being socially isolated seemed pretty overwhelming but, in retrospect, they had hidden gifts. Cancer put me in touch with caring people who wanted me to get better, my overbearing mother gave me the opportunity to see the loving concern in her, and being socially isolated gives me the chance to consider deep philosophical questions without being distracted.

So I suggest that you list three of your problems and how they serve you in a positive way. I think you need to take inventory of your strengths and also your perceived weaknesses that might be strengths in disguise.
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[User Picture]From: nitemirror
2006-03-10 07:07 pm (UTC)
Dealing with the few people I do has, and still is, changing the way I see others. Given that I have been coming to learn one of my parent's caregivers never acts without at least one and usually several hidden agendas, I've become more cynical. It seems my main purpose right now is keeping that person in check so she doesn't take more advantage of my parents than she has.

Dealing with my father's mental condition, I also think I've been learning to deal with difficult people better. Although, I used to be very laid back and slow to anger. My temper has become much shorter now, and I'm trying to deal with that too.

I do know about social isolation well also and how much time it gives one to think. I have found that for me too much of it sends my mind exploring paths I don't think should be explored on the human condition. Those thoughts don't mix well with fulfilling ones roles and living within society's idea of what the human condition is.

As for weakness, the latest quote I've been turning over in my head is another Bach quote, "Argue for your limitations and you make them your own." (or something along those lines, I don't have the exact quote in front of me right now).

Responsibilities and limitations. There's a whole book in that pondering that I'm almost scared to get into.
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