Nite Mirror (nitemirror) wrote,
Nite Mirror

I have been noticing an unusual weather phenomena lately. It rains in my basement. Even more unusual is that it only occurs in only one spot, directly under where the toilet is on the floor above. What is stranger yet is the rain only occurs when the toilet happens to be flushed.

Now the "old" me would have faced this problem by saying I'll wait until I can afford a plumber to deal with the problem, but NOT the "new" me. Back in college the new me had the misfortune to witness a fraternity brother changing a wax gasket in one of the toilets in the fraternity house. My memory recalled it seemed simple enough.

So off to the hardware store I went and bought a 90 cent wax gasket. I proceeded to take my toilet apart piece by piece. Other than a rather stubborn bolt that had a strong physical attraction with it's nut (the two didn't want stopping screwing around together). I had no problem turning my toilet into a collection parts scattered around what was formerly a recently cleaned bathroom. Also there was a large hole in the floor where the toilet used to be (the sewer pipe).

A bit of advice here. When the directions say to plug that hole while working, it might be a good idea to do so and resist the urge to look down the hole and stick your face where no face was meant to be put. It is a good thing my sense of smell is below average sometimes.

Moving on, at this point I was getting into some gunky areas (a technical term, don't worry if you don't understand it). The procedure for working in gunky areas is to wear a pair of gloves. No problem! I had the foresight to buy some expensive, reusable, neoprene-coated, work gloves while I was at the hardware store (in a lovely shade of blue too!).

So I get the gloves out of the box. I look at the size of them. I compare their dainty size to my mutton sized hands. The neanderthal part of me proceeds to try shoving a glove that is clearly too small for me onto my left hand. I paid a fair amount of money for those gloves by God I *will* use them. After several minutes of struggling I actually manage to somehow put the glove onto my left hand. My hand is numb from lack of blood, but the glove is on!

I look at the other glove sitting on the bathroom sink. I look at my gloved left hand. Now the rational part of my mind finally over-rules the neanderthal side and realizes I really don't want to go through all that struggling again. Plus with my left hand now numb and movement severely limited I may not be physically able to put the other glove on anyway.

So I reverse the procedure and spend the next several minutes struggling to remove the glove/tourniquet from my left hand.

With that episode behind me, I look at the mess, make a face and proceeded to work in the gunky area sans gloves. Having scraped all the old wax from the bottom of the toilet and around the hole in the floor (now plugged with the crumpled paper bag that the hardware store gave me to carry my new wax ring, and ... um, gloves).

Well, I proceeded to put that wax ring into place on the bottom of the toilet, start to put the toilet back over the hole, stop to remove the paper bag that was plugging the hole, then proceeded to put the toilet over the hole again, and went through the steps to reassemble my toilet.

Now with all the effort and brand new wax ring under my toilet what happens when I flush? It still rains in the basement. And my newly spotless bathroom, is now in worse shape than before I was on this cleaning phase I have been going through.

:::::sigh::::: Well, I guess I will have to borrow some money and call a plumber.
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