Last week the telemarketers were working overtime. One day I had five calls within a three hour span. So here is my new response to them. It brings all of them to a dead stop.
"This is Joe Blow from XYZ Company, is Mr. Ed Schwartz there please?"
"Well yes he is sort of. He died yesterday and we're having his wake. Would you like to talk to the widow?"
Cruel, but effective. Try it, you'll like it.